Sandbox of Thoughts

i am sleep deprived. let me tell u why.

its a musician thang so move aside if u dont get it.

ive got a new K’ that i couldnt play on because i was too busy the whole day. dropped it at home then rushed off to church. by the time i got home after we did our usual chilling and all, it was after midnight.

so… i couldnt sleep the whole night. its like depriving my ears of the sound of my new purchase. doesnt feel really good. so i got up especially early on a sunday morning to whack it. like finally.

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so i had a good breakfast in a VERY long time.

yup. all thanks to this very cool aunty, friend of my mum who took her out grocery shopping and buying all this cool stuff for her kids.

another week has gone by. not much development in the area of tuning my brain back to pre holidays period, period.

3 weeks to hello temasek poly.

That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on sunday morning
And I never want to leave

howdee- i got up early today and finished all my work assignments. am now waiting for boss-es to approve. i pray pray pray they wont be asses and throw more work back to me.

grab my money and go. this week has been one with alot of fluctuation of funds in my bank. i have sold off my vintage hats. and got myself 2 K’s. not like u would understand the terminology anyhow.

speaking of fluctuation. my mental state is in a mess. i am broke but still spending money. i am still waiting for my allowance. its been 28days. my music inspiration is messsed up too. i have a feeling it is directly related to your emotions. ive got 2 new grooves in my pocket this week. and it all came from some random happy shit within the week. i think i have nailed latin, lets move on.

this holiday, i have been thinking alot about weird things, and reading alot of weird books. dont worry, im not joining some cult or practicing satanism. and im pretty sure adjusting back to school life will be a pain. bcos i havent found anyone in school that is as weird as i am. i need to tear down the shield of fake-ism and start being myself more. i could die tomorrow and still not yet realise who i really am inside.

lord send me an angel. no, not too attractive to make a man lose his senses, rather, one who can knock some sense into him.

i have no idea why, but my eyes hurt. i dont think effects of being sunburnt invovled eyes right.

so anyway, nursing a flu. it sucks bcos i lose my mood to practice. and for everything else too.

Went for lesson today. Alvin suggested that i should consider taking the Trinity College Exams for Drums. Oh well, gonna cost money again. Its a good idea though. and i think i will give it alot of thought.

i should take a nap now. if i want to have a decent practice later. ta~

and im extremely sad about this one…

before i get to that,

im sunburnt, tired, aching, but REALLY satisfied with how i spent my saturday. It was really quite a humbling day for me where i know i had become the ’servant’ to many, in many ways. And God knows. Concludes the weeks where i undoubtly questioned where God was when i was feeling so down, no matter how small those thoughts were. =D

Im not one to manage a long entry about how great a day was, im no writer. So we had this Sentosa outing which we had planned for the con3 attachees, a sorta fun-goodbye. Spent 8 hours at the beach, 12 hours of company in total. Even when i was tired, hungry, in need of caffiene, whether i being sabo-ed, splashing or splashed, i had loved every single minute of it. Unforgettable, really.

powerpackgames

sabo-ed …did i mention i was feet to forehead, nosed-licked twice? and it wasnt even my fault.

soaked

while shaun was still around

afterbath

for what the beautiful memory is worth

cant get enough? heres the busted video.

no close-ups bcos i look like crap in the jungle.

Thanks to emman’s cam. we have an update. the remus and josh makeup-wrestle history replayed. 100x worse.

he didnt rush for the makeup. he only wanted to tackle me. seriously wth.

okay. not quite what i expected…

and i swear my ribcage would have given way had remus not help support the weight.
in order of closeness of face to the ground, bottom up. josh,remus,kenji,emman,shaun.

so this event marks the end of the con3 attachment. got to know most of them a whole lot better… and i hope that the time, money, breath and emotional investments wont go to waste. or else it would be really a sad thing. right? Hope to see everyone at youth mass September 29th

and pls pls pls, leave a comment if u visited!

good lord, today i slept for almost 12 hours.

felt so refreshed when i woke up. didnt start my book because it was way past morning reading period.

went for a run with emmanuel today, not bad eh… at least he didnt have to stop halfway although he did warn me about his being out-of-shape. we ended up doing some situps and pull-ups for myself.

i realised that my napfa, 2 weeks from now, is all the 5 stations and the 2.4km run crammed into one day. yes, WTH.

emman’s nice, he brought me dunkin donuts from malaysia. dont need to go on about how awesome they were. he let me rip his lifehouse album in exchange for davematthews discography. what a fair trade, righttt.

okay, managed to do quite abit of work on the respr website today. i think i can finish everything by thursday if i continue to put discipline my mind.

oh and that reminds me, i have to learn how to write invoices. wonder if e-invoices would work.

finally watched the simpsons movie today. it is really stupid, funny, as usual. i however dont think its worth paying so much to watch it in the cinemas though.

surprisingly shaun sent me more photos of the p5 camp without me asking. ive heard complains about him trying to sell them. LOL.

and before the excitement dies, and heres one where i look uber-tarded.

everyone was looking up at the eggs that were being dropped from the 3rd storey.

totally fun, fun, fun.

i suck as a facil so my group wasnt even close to winning as usual. wth right.

anyway, totally uplifting experience for me, pnw might not have been the best, but many were touched still.

saturday’s smiles from the kids kinda lifted my spirits about serving and i got that “u know its tiring, but rewards are great” kinda feel.

was there at 930am for worship practice, and the whole day ended at 7.30pm. incredible.

so heres me with co-facil gericho, and small-boy benedict.

thanks jacinta for the photo.

everyone else

this batch of attachees have been great. everything feels better now. so many talented kiddos. and wow.
i got another book to read now. yay.

PS: if anyone wants to use my images, go ahead. but please find your own image hosting. no direct links. thanks!

hello smokers, lookee here.

thats the ceiling design of a smokers lounge.

cool or what?

hello. i kinda have a swollen middle finger, a ripped toe, a few blisters. and there is practice tmr, lesson too.

the older generation dont appreciate new age designs. or maybe i dont understand the reason behind their reluctant-to-change habits.

oh well. as long u pay me, u have the final say.

anyway, i am done reading Lo. hope to get a new title in my hands this weekend. poets are really weird people… they can string things of all sorts together and let people allow themselves to be lost in what they read. its a funny thing that such queerness can allow some to feel envious of the way their minds are wired.

i am eyeing the unattainable, the placing of a foreign object into my heart. the outcome being one that is really unrealistic. this is the replay of that fateful june-july mystical occurance/change in my mindset that has happened for 2 years now where i have allowed my emotions to take over my sanity. so wait, its september, im late.

today i spent 4 hours on the basketball court with the guys. for the record, im not quite a fan of basketball, dont hate the fellowship.

p5 camp this sat. break free at 140bpm. maybe emmanuel shall get the shot at it.

can i take a break from being a leader?

sure.

So here i am, burying myself in my few new jobs.

got woken up by the buzzing of my phone today. ughh. how often do i get that…

so i started on my first assignment, to redevelop the respr website. i really wonder where i get my inpsiration to start when i havent even heard anything about payment yet.

met christie and heng for dinner. we are so bloody bored and stupid i think, took a cab all the way to marriot. ate at paragon, walked around far east. and cabbed back home after a heavy dose of gelato.

i might just get diabetes one day. oh well. so stupidly spent $30. i guess hanging out with them kinda made it worth it.

i know your name, i praise you for your glory, worship u with my limbs and tongue.

however, dear fadher, i havent been able to feel ur spirit flowing through my blood.

today i was like a wired mannequin, with an attached battery that really didnt sustain me through the length of day. alas, when everything was over, 6pm. i actually felt relieved then.

i am weak and i really cant wait any longer. i hate to feel short especially when im placed on the platform meant to connect you and your people. i am ashamed of myself. give me a clue, point me in the right direction, PLEASE.

for now i will try… engrossing myself in the work of secular things. of assignments and deadlines. perhaps it might contrast the significance of earning your presence as to my keep.

on my part. i am sorry for i might have for some occasions put you as second to the technicalities of laying down a song perfectly. strive for excellence in your work, rather than perfection in this craft that u created.